What does freedom mean to you?
For me, it means freedom from debilitating pain that took my body and mind hostage. In April 2010, a combination of toxic prescriptions turned my life into a hellish nightmare. Cymbalta didn't help me; it hurt me badly. Benzodiazepines severely interacted with Cymbalta.
By October 2010, my health spiraled out of control. I had a near death experience. It landed me in the hospital when I was quickly tapered off of Cymbalta. I had hoped to get better. Sadly, my circumstances became far worse.
In January 2011, during a desperate moment to seek help to taper Benzodiazepines, I admitted myself into the hospital. My idea of gently tapering Ativan and the doctor's idea of tapering Ativan were not the same.
I preferred a gradual, safe taper. Unfortunately, the arrogant doctor insisted on abruptly stopping Ativan in four short days. He could have killed me!
On the same day the doctor abruptly stopped Benzos, he discharged me from the hospital. Mystified that he didn't want to monitor me being off the drug, I begged the nurse to let me stay in the hospital. She refused and sent me home.
On my first night home from the hospital, I experienced wicked withdrawals. A furnace of affliction that felt like I was dying. (For the whole story, check out my memoir, Harvest of Hope: Living Victoriously Through Adversity.)
In January 2011, it was not until I lost my health that I realized how precious it was to me. My healing journey was an uphill battle. A long, drawn out process that took many years to recover. As I reflect on my horrifying ordeal, I believe that it was most definitely worth fighting for.
Prescribed harm hurt me. It was devastating and disabling. Potent medicine destroyed my Central Nervous System, brain, organs, and overall health. It sabotaged my ability to function as a productive person in our society.
Thankfully, I jumped off the medical merry go round. I made positive lifestyle and diet changes. I practiced self-care. Ultimately, natural wellness, self-care, and the grace of God saved my life!
It was only after I had recovered from those toxic chemicals that I could see that I needed to be free from countless other things. An old mindset. Not speaking the truth because others criticized me for it. False beliefs about myself, my family, and secrets that were an unspoken code of silence.
In 2016, I started a new healing journey. To revisit my childhood abuse. Statutory rape. My anguish from being sexually assaulted by my sister's husband. Serious dysfunction in my family of origin.
Bravely, I unraveled the missing pieces. I came to understand why I had chronic pain. You see, there is a mind-body connection to physical pain. Oftentimes, abuse, assaults, and trauma cause our body to go into fight or flight.
Our brain is so wise that it wants to protect us from our painful experiences. Therefore, we may repress memories. Despite challenges with remembering our past, flashbacks can haunt us.
Yet, there's beauty for ashes. To rise above our hardships and tragedies. To do the hard work to heal. Seriously, you are worth it and so am I.
My friends, there’s nothing more important than being free from whatever binds us, keeps us stuck, holds us back, or prevents us to be whole, healthy, happy, and living up to our fullest potential.
On July 4, 2019, my e-book, Sacred Wandering, will be FREE. Consider it as my gift to you for healing and hope.
Learn how to be free from:
- Chronic Pain
- Toxic Relationships
- Unholy Strongholds
- False Beliefs
- Emotional Wounds
- Church Hurt
- Lukewarm Faith
- Feeling Like You're Not Enough
Start a journey of healing and hope. Reclaim your freedom. Reclaim your life!
On July 4, 2019, grab your FREE copy of my e-book, Sacred Wandering: Growing Your Faith In The Dark.
“So if the Son sets you free, you will be free indeed.” John 8:36 (ESV)