I have realized that what I focus on will grow. For bad or for good. We either feed our mind negativity, which is draining or we feed our mind what is positive, which is beneficial.
Like a garden, we must tend to the weeds and whatever holds us back from living our destiny. We must water our garden. Give it sunshine and TLC. To weed out what doesn't belong in our lives.
Our words, thoughts, beliefs, and actions create our reality. Our thoughts directly correlate's with our physical, emotional, and spiritual wellness.
Positive changes mean we have the courage to take radical action. To walk away from anything that no longer serves us. To let go of what's weighing us down or holding us in bondage. To release toxic relationships. To not participate in anything that will hurt us.
Starting in 2011, I began doing the hard work of healing. I acknowledged my painful past. I addressed the unspeakable things that happened to me. I had spent years in therapy to address my hard rock moments.
Along the way, I was silenced by the abusers. This led to being quiet for six more years. Feeling as if my voice, my story, and my life had no value.
By 2017, I could no longer remain silent. Inner courage bubbled up inside of me. I was determined to work more diligently on healing my deep trauma wounds.
Child neglect & abuse.
A dysfunctional family.
Father and mother wounds.
My sister's husband who sexually assaulted me.
My toxic birth family who created smear campaigns against me and who tried to destroy me.
Complex PTSD from compounded trauma.
Betrayal, manipulation, and ongoing gaslighting from my relatives.
Since 2010, I've been healing from Fibromyalgia and my nightmare with potent prescriptions that nearly killed me. Years of wicked withdrawals and recovery. I’m heading into my 10- year anniversary of being free from medicine. It saved my life!
For 3 years, my recovery has accelerated. I have processed my pain, abuse, suffering, and everything that happened to me. I’ve sifted through the dirt to unravel the truth about abuse.
I have talked about it. Journaled where it hurts. Blogged about it. Wrote books about my true stories and healing journey.
On YouTube, I have shared countless videos pertaining to prescribed harm, wicked withdrawals, toxic medicines, dysfunctional families, narcissists, being harassed by my siblings and their families, and how I eventually went no contact.
I believe that healing requires utter honesty. Healing our wounds means that we face it head on. We don’t not deny it, ignore it, minimize it, nor do we detach from it.
We must revisit our past in order to work through it. We feel it to heal it. Like an onion, it may sting. Layer upon layer of painful memories need to be examined. It’s okay to express human emotions, including legitimate sadness, grief, anger, and disappointment.
I have confronted my past trauma. I have put in the effort to untangle the mess. To express my authentic emotions. I have done the challenging work of recovering from toxic relationships and traumatic events.
On a brighter note, I’m experiencing a super powerful shift. I can no longer focus on negativity. I’m releasing my toxic family from my life.
Big Announcement: I will no longer be talking or writing about medicine and the unhealthy dynamics of narcissistic abuse. After many years of writing and recording videos about those subjects, I am done with it.
There's an inspiring quote that resonates with me. It says, "If you focus on the hurt, you will continue to suffer. If you focus on the lesson, you will continue to grow." I am a believer in learning valuable life lessons.
The good news is that it’s time to shift gears. To talk and write about something more uplifting and inspiring. To concentrate on topics that are advantageous to our overall well-being.
This amazing awakening is exciting! I am ready for something new. To move forward in my beautiful purpose. To focus on personal and professional growth, peace, abundance, kindness, compassion, wisdom, and love.
A new era is starting. This shift brings a brand-new focus. To concentrate on what nourishes my body, mind, and soul.
In effort to stay true to myself and my passionate purpose, I will be taking a YouTube break. It may be for one month in June 2020 or possibly the whole summer. It's necessary for me to reset, refuel, and recharge.
Thank you for understanding how important this new beginning is for me. That I am transitioning into a new season of my life.
Self-care is an essential part of it. Gaining clarity and wisdom about my future is vital.
I am going to honor this safe space where I am at. To be still. To take time to gain a better understanding of the great things that are ahead of me.
As I end my blog post, Fred the red cardinal has flown to my window to visit me. His partner Winona has joined him. I can hear them chirping in the distance.
It's almost like they showed up in such a time as this to cheer me onward. To give me hope. For me to embrace my wings. To expand myself on my new horizons.
Ready. Set. Go. It's time for me to fly!!!